Awkward Honest

I am re-igniting

the boy in the bath

for i was not yet a man
there was glass smashing under our boots
and we had been swimming

she followed me with her camera
into the ruins

i wanted to be naked before her
bare my soul, give her everything
be her muse, her lover

the smashed steel was so cold
i screamed with the pain of it
and she took pictures

we were digging up the past
and kissed only twice
once at Callanaich under the stars
once beside a waterfall on the mainland
in a torrential rainstorm

i have never known such kisses since
we disappeared

now you know

Carry You Across

I kiss your forehead

You blink
doe eyed

The heather burning
The tarn bursting

You soar
gold feathered

The lightning arcing
the mountain splitting

You dive
rainbow warmed

The oceans folding
the planets dancing

You cry
perfume drenched

The sky melting
the gods laughing

You sleep
darkness free

His blood
is coursing
through you
Times heartbeat
holds you
in her arms.

'profile'

We fit

no descriptors
no charts
no type
no demographic
no race
no zodiac
not ecto
not endo
no condition
no illness
no dysfunction
no class
no scale
no pass
no faill

We are
unique,
made of
stars.

Beginnings

She is cut from her car
drenched in blood
to match the paintwork
her lips the color of sky

beneath his boots
glass crackles and splits
arcing blue light bouncing
over the dead black road

she is holding their
twin daughters
on her hips
all of them smiling
for his camera

in his arms
they are warm
grinning with joy
for
milk and sunshine
and honey

her eyes flutter
with the oxygen
and the plastic
in her throat
and through the chaos
his teeth flash bright

"i am going to take care of you"
and
"it is going to be alright"

they take their babies
beautiful pink fingers
and wrap them gently
just for a second of time
around the pohutukawa sapling
for a blessing
touch this
he digs the hole deep
with a shiny stainless blade

the ketamine
kicks in hard
but she is aware
of his hands
looking for her
feeling for her
damage and strength

the car lets go
its grasp
and many gloves
lift her free
carry her onto
bound softness
and morphia

she is always pleased
to look at him
to see him
sometimes it is as if
the very air is on fire
when he steps bravely
through the doors
she heats up
when they talk

he breaks the rules
alone in the speeding ambulance
kisses her forehead
as his eyes follow
the peaks and troughs
of heartbeat
and breath
he cries
for she is a stranger
yet he knows
her name

and she places
the tiny plant inside
red earth
knowing, feeling, seeing
one hundred years pass
until
someone will hug
the gnarled splitting boughs
and understand

On The Island.

We considered diving into the heaving ocean, but settled instead for a deep rock pool that sat halfway down a massive slope of ancient cliff. We were naked before everyone, how they laughed at our stupidity and clumsiness on the boulders. The cold was shocking as we gingerly entered the water, we swam over crayfish and blue cod glinting in the spring light. Emerging, it felt as if our skin was on fire in the salt breeze. As we sat drying ourselves with our clothes, you said how beautiful and brave you thought I was, wanting to swim, when the others were content merely to observe. How very different I was, so exciting. How fast I moved, quick to action, inspired by chance. That you loved me.

The Dancing Girl In the Clouds

On the beach
she is spinning in circles
her arms held open

A dog
nuzzles into her warmth,
her scent

In West Kennet
a wall disappears
and the face appears
from the shadow
once again
then retreats

The dog is transfixed,
running through snow
towards her

Loyalty is the moon
to him,
bleeding with desire

Though she dances,
the clocks tick on
with soul music

Now as always
too sudden
too soon

Emerald Mountain

You are
Impossible to Ignore

Those eyes
have me
whole and unprepared
Within minutes
you knew everything

We hold on
so tightly

Real

Navigator

she smells of
candyfloss and caramel
and opium and wine and
peaches and peonies and
salt and sunlight and
incense and gunpowder and
kakapo and koru and
rain and earth and champagne
and oysters and pepper and
fire

white cell

diamonds on fire
beach break champagne
kelp wash sun strobe
daughter of day dreams
blood neon geode
song of scoria
ginger heart rembrandt
hebridean blush
you are my
one minute muse
gypsy strawberry mirror
blinded beauty
read poetry
while you burn back
on your elbows
in summer grass
honey breath
you breathe

write to me

write to me
write to me so that i may
see the form of your hand
the shape of your wrist
the curve in your elbow
write to me
so that i may read
of time lost
and found again
of freedom gained
of passion past
of a smoke filled room
the beat of a drum
solid schist crystal
sentinels of our dreams
in which we touch
the angels you have birthed
the waves i ride
write to me
so i can remember
how it was
our dance with the moon

Teignmouth

i make new memories
in this village of my past
like the new page you see
disappearing beneath this ink
the cross-fade of love
washes cubes of color
from the paintbox
she is gone
she was always there
fired with heat
aglow from a black sand sun
it is time
clock of surrender
switching oiled gears
across the flat bill bored desert
you take my water
and i realise
you were only a mirage

in the valley of death
we escape
from a guerilla bullet
into a perfect helter hole
skelter dark
a drop
perfect into a huge cavern
lizard watching
wet limed
stone forms quickly
filled, busied with life
catacomb of civilisation
that we so quick the pioneers
cannot are not allowed
to be in the first space again
but i find my self in
her arms
to profess eternity
diamond ring
on fire as she takes my head
in her soft arms

Bunhill Fields

William Blake said to me
(he was nearby)
blessings my son for you
are one of the many few
who have seen fair London
on its deepest brightest
longest darkest day
(his grey angel wings fluttering away)

what is it to see
the bloodied husk of death
waiting for his man
and the other
bright tide puller
phospherous above
batter seas four pylons?

my answer
to his raucous silence
is the mirrored reflection
of a tree in the ocean
surface of her
blonde pearl smile

PTSD

love like blood
goodbye
hello
it all turns blue
stripped
free from attachment
life or death
no compromise
only space between

i think it was more like fourteen
your path parallel
but not the same
we are one heart
but not the same
crying come back
tearing apart
like drowning
slipping from my grasp
one thousand years
of sadness in your smile
sweetness
we are remembering
our future
before it begins
we will be
great

how will it end this time
with fire?
with saltwater
marbling down our windows
made of waves
that generate out
past the island
that always looks the same
no matter
which aspect
we gaze upon

blood only blood
show me
let me feel
all the love
all the pain
all the birth
all the death
give me everything

i hope
the waters hold you
and the currents
are fair

how different
our bodies are
i must descend
to hold you
you must ascend
to kiss me
the crown of your head
smells of sunshine

the slap of release
timing
get up fast
stay low
stay fluid
and ride
the dynamics
in the direction
you want to go

i let go
i let go
and all my boyhood
dreams come true

since you went away
the blink
of your feathered eye
wings silently across
a night of swaying
and wet bluster
the white boats
swing around
their moor lines
and you,
you fly away

Stuck

I make the ocean
my lover
your name
is my reason
the cyclic
beat of our heart
swelling
with strength
and period

i push out
into
and under
you open
my eyes
inside
and when you form
i climb up
and at last
we dance

there is much more
to you
than i see
beyond the beacon mast
and the fire
are brightest days
fiercer storms
and bigger love

i commit my soul
to the only truth
the ocean
my mountain
her eyes twinkling
her face wrinkling

we both know
to be held in
the arms of our land
is older
is more passionate
than all the words
we do not say

to each other

Come Back

find me
go searching after we die
at the sunrise
find me
bury me with gold
and i will kiss you
with my first breath
find me
let not our years end
this time
find me
disobey any rule
that would keep us apart
dance with others
then find me

Eternal and Unconditional

words before fruit
a hug and a headache
her forearm as smooth as slow marble
the fire of azrael
clocks wound up
a beach fused to glass
an unstoppable force
kissing
an immovable object
geoglyphs
my heart eaten
your form prone
slipping under
climbing over
i love the ink
softening and blurring
al bean crying:
"please, just two more hours"
waiting all my life
to see you
one hundred elephants
moving invisible through the trees
milk green depth
the chess game of sanity
standing across the fault line
quail in a daisy dancing field
the winged figure
in the cave
it was'nt all sun bright days for us
sometimes it was curtains of mist
and lightening
filling the tanks
stirring the sediments
the dog barking outside
your window
waiting for a plane
the holiday in Spain
piggy back
across the river
i shutter you away
photograph you in my eye
a love letter from albion
the blue fire on dun i iona
lit with the last match
so perfect in every fault and wrinkle
two men with the same name
two women both of them crying
caramel and birdsong
sonic priests of the virgin
working with a diva
making love with shiva
dressed in white
a walk to the beach
white water i curl under
clasp the silver shiny
look up to see
the boiling blossom
cicada synapse
to watch these two
after the collapse of the weight of the past
now the paths he cut
have curved
into the landscape
now the bodies
she has soothed
have spilled out into the world
and the wind blows sweet
scented desire up
the valley

Somewhere A Long Time Ago A Long Way Away Another Girl Another Planet

I remember You
Your Kisses
The Ocean

Flesh of Heart

heart of fire
warrior sister
plateau passion

why'd you do that?
scupper me or scupper you
broken home but no broken bones
cast adrift and alone
no matter
who i am with
being alone but
hearing angels cry out
for her sweet eyes
classic turns of fate
a pebble in my mouth
of drought

she said
i want to die
surrounded by my children
she said
i want a partner
to protect and provide
for our child and I
its almost too much
to bear
this weight of love
leave it all behind
shall we?
elope into the water
cut the anchor roper
start with nothing
like children
learning to walk
i still and always will love her
but i am never
really there

a usual story

she sang
you always want more
she sang
i don't believe in heaven
i'm taller than god
homeless restless and eternal
so
the victory sign to the troops
two fingers up to the suits

this is only the beginning of the change
shedding my cage
losing the rage

adyu merushi

sorely tested
you've been hurt
so you hurt others
do'nt have an affair
wide awake at three
staring at the ceiling
the mistake
again
hold on
it will happen for you
the peace which you long for
the strength
the honesty
the laughter

have we learnt the lesson yet?
its the way you move me
and the way i'd like
to make you feel

cheetah
deciever
dream stealer
darkness after dawn
fragile hands
dance for me
i cough up anger
cry
you sing for the moon
i sing for the sun
she does not understand this side of me
a view of everything
the left hand path

dead three times
on the operating table
left with a white sheet
over your smashed body
it is only when your mother
comes to sob over you
there is a twitch, a spark
you come back...."Hello"

a cord mended, bound, burnt
this is for you sister
please stay alive
for the struggle
for the power you wield
for the love you make
for the art you make

You Know

NIN Beside You In Time

Cinnamon Candy

Honey and Hot
Water Bees Sting
Your Crown
My Skin
Just Fizzing
With Bubbles
Of Air
A Glass
Of Wine
At Three
And A
Considered
Response
I Did
Think of You
It Was.........
Laughter
Futures Forming
Waters Warming

VICTORY !

over Fear
over Oppression
over Control
over Authority
over Subjugation
over Karma
over Chemicals
over Dogma
over Depression
over Aqquisition
over Surface
over Repression
over Subjugation
over Imprisonment
over Money
over Complication
over Hunger
over War
over Possession
over Obsession
over Want
over Death
over Time

Gilbert, George and Me. Tokyo Subway.

Photo: Ruben Rubiola

Tokyo

"It is snowing"
"I am here"
A monk rings
The bell

Yellow

She dreams of an Eden
The fireflys bugging out
With an electric green
Light show
A man
A woman
A child
Marvel at the stars
As their boat
Drifts slowly
Oceanward down
The widest river

Perfume and perfection
A time
For Purification
Strip naked
Dive in
Deepest Sea
Brightest Moon

You flew down
From the Sistine rafters
Plucked a feather from
My waxed wings
Breathed new life in
With incense smoke

Up with the curtain
Start the show!

Double degree
No broken knee
Spray her name
Across your wall
The 12th sign
At the cross roads
She sat down
And asked
For electricity...

Sci Fi Plot

Jet Goth Girl and Robot Teddy Boy: They met in the paranormal romance sector of the forbidden planet. Together they fought off the vixens from Venus and the masturbaters from Mars, saved the Universe and re-populated the World.